What BDSM is to me…

There are lots of types of play that I wouldn’t try with just anyone. Right from impact play to breath play. I crumble. I sometimes feel defeated by my limits. Not everyone gets to see me feel broken. Not everyone gets to put me back together. From gentle to hardcore, play makes me feel closer to my partner. He is the Ying to my Yang.

BDSM is trust

Trust that my Dom knows what’s good for me and what’s not good for me. What’s going to push me over the limit, and what’s going to push me just enough. When to stop, and when to wait an extra second or two. Yes, I still panic, but he knows how to pacify me. I learn to let go and give my mind and my body more and more, and I find the freedom of it rewarding.

BDSM is honesty

Honest communication is everything. If you tell someone you’re happy to be used with nothing in return, that’s precisely what you’re going to get. And I’ve been there, before I knew the rules of the game. Now I know that it’s ok to be a bit bratty or a bit of a princess at times. I know when and how to get mine, whether it’s a pussy full of cum (my actions will speak for themselves) or a beating (I sometimes give a heads up). Nobody can read minds. If I say I’m ready to be choked again, I’m ready to be choked again. If I say I need more cuddles, I need more cuddles. I feel like I can never ask “are you ok?” enough, because I want to be sure you’re feeling how you say you’re feeling, and I want to be sure you’re feeling ok. I want to get in your head so I know how to make things better.

BDSM is openness

Openness to explore the unknown, try out the taboo, do all those things I never thought I could do. From anal play to group play to alternative relationships. Openness to face and conquer my fears. To overcome my insecurities. To experience things I never in my wildest dreams thought I could do, and to learn to embrace it.