So You, Want to Find a Daddy…
By far and away the question both myself and my LittleLady are asked is: “How do I find a Daddy?”.
This is a tough question to answer simply because everyone is different.
Full disclosure as I’m probably not the best to ask. Up until I met You two years ago I had never considered myself to be a Daddy (other than to my kids). I had identified as Master or Dominant.
The first piece of advice I have to give is that you can’t let your little choose her partner. You just can’t. No offense littles but you pick ice cream over dinner. Seriously though, finding a partner has to be approached the same way as you’d “adult” for a job or other things. The problem with going into little space is that everything looks fun. Everyone looks trustworthy.
This of course begs the question about being authentic.
This is a good point and it depends on how you disclosed your kinks. However, any Daddy or partner isn’t going to, of course, spend the time with the little or adult you but rather with both. Meeting, talking and forming a connection first and then introducing the kink dynamic parts makes the most sense to me. The kind of Daddy that is attracted to (or demands) a little who gives her little over on the first meeting is probably not the kind that makes a good long-term Daddy.
Bringing the little out over time is a good approach because it helps rule out potential problems. If every time a little shows their little side and the response is agitation, frustration or embarrassment then that should tell the little all they need to know. To me this is the same as a Daddy asking for the little side to be suppressed because they are tired of dealing with it. Looking long term do you want a Daddy who can’t handle you being little when you need to the most?
I think along with this advice goes the advice to not get emotionally invested too quickly. Put up enough walls that you stay somewhat protected but not too many that they can’t get to know you. A lot of the littles we talk to don’t see all the flaws because they are so smitten so quickly. That happens in lots of different relationships but in a DD/lg relationship it seems to happen quicker and stronger.
Trust your gut…
I hate those lists of predatory traits that go around Fet ever so often as I think they are too general. Basically, if you think you’ve found a Daddy and something doesn’t feel right then you should trust your gut. A lot of the time we get requests for advice and it’s pretty clear that the “Daddy” in the relationship has another partner who doesn’t know about the little. Last minute cancellations, only able to talk at strange specific times. Probably a bad sign.
A Daddy who requests you to put your little away instead of asking for her to come out. Probably a bad sign.
If your Daddy only enjoys your little at the sexy time. Probably a bad sign. Take a step back and look at the whole picture. Is this a person who is likely to stick around? And if so will you enjoy their company in 3 months or 6?
